Today was the 3rd lesson at the Ulpan and, as with the first 2, there was a LOT of material in a short amount of time. Interestingly enough we learned the Hebrew words for song and sing. The instructor today, who was new to our class and did not know us, started asking each of us in turn if we sang. Naturally I said yes, and she held up a picture of Pavarotti. After a brief chuckle I said no, I do not sing opera but sing only prayers. She said to go ahead, so I sang part of a Torah portion I had learned. As soon as I started her jaw dropped, and when I stopped a minute later everyone applauded. I guess it was an amusing diversion for me, and I had mixed feelings about it. Part of me was a little embarrassed and another part was a little proud. I’m not sure if that is a good thing or not and will have to give it some thought over the next day or so.
Today was also the BIG day: my first meeting with the cantorial instructor. Contrary to my own expectations I was not really nervous about this meeting. The feeling that I was doing what Hashem wanted me to was born out during the course of the evening.
The very first thing he did was ask me to sing the Stars Spangled Banner. I remembered some of the words and he provided the rest. I thought that went ok. Then he asked about reading and following printed music, which I can do, and then had me sight-sing a little. On that one I did moderately well, but we found, not to my surprise, that I needed some work there.
We progressed into some of the melodies from the Friday evening service. I was given “the minimum”, which is what a lay person would do, and then also given the cantorial rendition. I sang those this evening as well, and as soon as I did the first one I KNEW I was doing the right thing! I just felt it. The second I completed that first cantorial rendition I felt an immediate connection with Hashem and a very deep sense of purpose and serenity. It is an instant I will never forget!
Those who know me best know that I never really thought much of my voice. To me it is just natural. When I mentioned to the instructor that I have never had a voice lesson he told me not to tell any of his other students. He said that he was amazed I could sing as well as I did without having any previous instruction and that that kind of capability was extremely rare. I guess since he has been teaching for over 50 years he knows what he is talking about and I will have to believe him, but it still seems very strange to me that something I find so natural is really so rare. I am truly blessed and humbled by that knowledge.
I have found my calling and bless Hashem for the gift of a voice and the opportunity to learn to use it properly in His honor.
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